“We shall not cease from exploration. And the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time …” (TS Eliot,The Four Quartets)
I come alive
in hearing the flock of voices within myself.
I enter a conversation with allies
who walked the path and stayed in the question
a fire is burning bright and warming me up
from the inside out
what will help me tend the fire?
this has been and will be
a search for the paradoxes
hearing the voices
from the singular to the plural
and as I am tending
the fragical
I carry my own contradictions
as I am embracing the whole and the many
as I am embracing the whole and the many
and as I am tending
the fragical
I want to ask the wisdom of the fire
about the guiding thread in all we do
about the different colors of the fractals
and I want to ask the wisdom of the fire
how do we come back towards simplicity, without simplifying what is complex?
like a process of removing layers, to finally reach something essential
something that that lives with us
and that we carry as we sit with our fellow human beings.
I want to ask the wisdom of the fire
what it is that shakes me
what it is that I need to care for
what is alive in me that can light the life in others
I want to ask the wisdom of the fire
how do I tend to the fragical?
as a living being in a living context
surrounded as I am by the wave
I boarded a ship
to learn to stay in the question
yet keep looking for answers
and in that work I am not alone
there are old friends who have walked that path
and who told their stories about the journey
questions flare up, left and right
I came up and I came down
I find the wave
I feel compelled to play and to question the play
I wake up to the grey zone
where togetherness transpires
I look around, and I look inside
and I am off-balance
I look at others, and I look inside
and I find discomfort
and I find comfort
simplicity can make us travel to rich lands
and bring us back to questions
brings me to the difference I may fear to face
that lies beyond words
we found mountains
to climb
we panted and sweated
our mouths were thick and pasty
as words were bleeding
silence became pregnant
I crawled in the space between words
I dreamt of battles with ghosts
I dreamt of stillness in action
I dreamt of the alchemy of intention
I dreamt of question marks
I dreamt of stillness in action
I dreamt of intention
the wave
that I was talking to
I tried to tame it with good looks
I thought she could hear me out
and a breath put me in motion
and the fire of the question got me talking
without words
from within the wave
my journey and my home
fire in water
what is alive in me
a trembling light of truth
I am the guardian of that fire
I am touching the opposites
I am becoming the in between
I am learning to breathe
I am holding the flame in the wave
I am learning to breathe
living and acting in the space between
And I welcome the call
whenever I can hear it
I listen to the breath that walks me in
after the wave scrapes the bottom
and while I keep my eyes on the flame
the dust settles into new patterns
and nothing gets lost
and nothing gets lost
we are stubborn in breath
we are persistant in being
looking closely at the mess that was left,
I saw questions
questions about difference
questions about integrity,
questions about openness.
how do I learn to stay in the question ?
how do I learn to live in the question
with truth and an open heart?
my eyes are frown
and I am so focused it hurts my ears
and my eyes swell up
and I cannot see
and I cannot hear
I see myself drop the question mark
and I have had to sit
and I wear my question mark like a crown
I have to dive in the wave of living otherness
find the sameness in the difference
and the difference in the sameness
and all arrows point
towards that cushion of discomfort
and I feel sucked towards the grey zone
and I now wonder
where is the color?
and I start peeling the layers to see them shine
and I learn to sing my question marks
going deeper into the grey zone
truth lies beyond words and beyond the heart
the depth lies in the surface
the flame is shining light on the heart
and I take the time to taste whatever comes up
it is the taste of the grey zone
it is the taste of stones
the salt of the waves
the salt of the tears of my peers
it is the salt of the tears of the multitudes before us
tears of joy and grief and pain and gratitude
in that time where I taste
I sense, I feel the grey zone where we practice
I live the change that is emerging
with always more questions rising.
and then come back to the flame
of intention.
Is what I am doing feeding life?
Is what is alive in me alive in you?
I am dancing in the wave
eyes slowly opening up
uncertainty is where I live
As I build the muscle of presence
with the confidence to speak from the heart
with a desire to care for what is alive
I step into the fear of the body
I step into the gaze of the other
I step into my learning edge
the wave is eroding my defenses
as I hang on to the torch
my eye firmly planted into the shadow of the question,
I project on the wall of my resistance
to build the trust of ethical practice
I want to listen to the body
I want to learn the heartbeat
and move with the breath
I am growing in my power
to let my breath lead me
where my heart is sitting
and show it to you
so that together we can dance for a while
and so that we can learn to listen
and so that we can explore the power of that tiny flame,
and so that we can learn to wear the torch and create a vision together
lighting up the grey zone
of learning
where I am meeting my other selves
where I see new possibilities
I become the question mark
What is clarity?
when do we need it?
how do we use it?
how do we serve it?
I become the question mark
We get our power from the grey zone
where we breathe together
in safe uncertainty
I become the question mark
between fire and and water
something is sprouting
something is alive
I become the question mark
we are sitting still
we are no longer immobile
we have met and we are fertile soil
there was loss on the way
there was a dance
a craving to find the fire again
at times where it had been lost
a focus on the initial spark.
I am the keeper of that fire of practice
and simplicity weaves a basket for that fire
I carry it where I go
I am warmed up by it
it lives with me
I walk with it
I walk through, unconscious, blind
open the eyes when the fire weakens
I enter the dance,
keep the invitation
and I remember that invitation is a verb.
what is my truth?
and where does that truth come from?
and how do I share my truth with you?
without forcing it on you?
but in true spirit of openness?
how do I carry my flame?
without blowing yours?
I am the question mark
I want to build a home around the flame
and the flame will keep us warm
and the stories we build will make us wise
there, in the circle around the fire,
there, in the eye of our home,
we are calling for the wave
we learn that knowledge leaks
there, in the circle around the fire
there, in our common zone of ignorance
I cannot lie to you
as I attempt to weave with you the story
that the wave is waiting to take
after the wave comes the harvest
the question has taken new shapes
what is there, after the wave,
what is there as I wait for the next wave?
where does the need to build stories come from?
I build houses for the mind, made out of sand
like castles I trace on the beach
my castles of meaning
patiently, quietly, relentlessly
until they are swept away
And I learn persistence
and as I mourn these lost traces of my meanings
I look at the torch I am carrying
I see the shadows it is throwing on the sand
the shadows stretch further and contort
and I build more homes
the castles of meaning are swept away
and I am left with the next questions
a basket with red-hot coals
with the trembling flame of my question
I step in the dark
there is excitement
and the images abound
and generate more images
I blow the light and tell you who I am
I carry the light and I am the question mark
I hear your gifts and learn the game
I play games seriously
I dance with the life in me and you
I am throwing myself in flow
I dance on the way towards you,
I dance in the dance
I dance and by dancing I build
I am bowing to what is alive in us right now
I am bowing to what is alive in you right now
I am honouring the gifts
I am bowing to the life in me that resonates with the life in you
I am stretched towards you,
in full patience
acting from the grey
acting from the wave
acting from the heart
acting from the question
acting with your gifts
I care for what is alive between us, here and now
from my seat in the wave, I can create
I can support the world that is emerging.
from my seat in the wave can I hear the call.
this is a journey whose destination is a journey
the water in the wave is never the same
I breathe. I observe. I am ready. I feel no fear.
from my seat in the wave I listen. I am ready.
from my seat in the wave I am like water
what is ethical practice?
it is alive in the encounter
it is alive in the here and now humility
that allows me to see you and create with you
something that was not there
I live the question mark when I create with you
something beyond what we know
when we meet, in the interstitial pockets
between what lies between our stories
there is no end in sight to the vertigo
there is the question that leads to more questions
where new flames start flickering
we tend to the questions as a tribe
we build the pit, one wooden stick at a time
we tangle we dance we fall
we recreate from the ashes
something that will help us breathe better
in the wave
how do we harness the power
How do we dance together
and discover now ways of walking
without shattering our bones?
even in motion, there is stillness
through which I look for the trembling world that is sprouting
see the cycle of life and death
and the power to build the world we need
being human is dancing
between chaos and order
I am practicing the delicate art of balancing rocks
I am deciding between noise and silence
between chaos and entropy
I tend to the process of learning for life
we tend to what is alive
and needs to grow
we tend to what is dead
and needs to go
As I live I dive into the doubt
I carry the flame of questioning
deep into myself
As I live I tend the flame
and suspend the answer
as I live I breathe uncertainty
I walk away from the comfort of easy answers
as I practice I look for safety in uncertainty
I walk the chaordic path
knowing full well that we are together in different spaces
as I live I welcome guests into their grey zone
as I live I inhabit the edges of what I know
I do not know what I will find there
as I live I keep a link with what is known
a rope that connects me to the surface
as I dive into the wave
as I live I look for the fine line that separates chaos and order
where creation can come up
simple is complex
simple is zooming in stillness
simple is an open field
so that magic can take foot
simple is an open field of living relationships
rewiring connections for new possibilities and new worlds
we will be walking oft-travelled paths, but creating new journeys
and new experiences for a new kind of conversation
that touches the heart and feeds the fire
from the grey zone of accepted and open ignorance
the practice is learning in practicing
life.
I will come and walk with you
I will come and watch you walk
what is alive in you
and how you enchant the world
I will listen to your stories and how you crafted them
I will trace new homes in the sand
temporary order to the world
through inquiry I tend the fire
with which we build our power
I do not ride the wave
I am in the thick of it
I learn to be like water
alive and grounded in groundlessness
I see blind spots in the corner of my eyes
but I will not act blindly
I paint escapes in my gaze to the littlest traps
how do I make my choices?
between action and non-action.
how will I determine where I stay upright, and where I bend with the wind?
how will I know what must stay fuzzy and what should be smoothed out?
we are not fixated in time nor in space.
we are simple and practice stillness
and we learn by understanding our actions as they come into being in the world
and we learn by letting go of our mistakes
and we learn by inhabiting the opening between action and reflexion
we extract meaning
dig beyond language
but what does that mean?
for us, to ask what is alive?
at any present moment?
where I stand, what is alive?
what are we caring for, what is alive?
– what is here –
simplicity is humility
humility is inquiry
here and now humility
I am building up power
power to hear the calls,
power to make the calls
I can wake up to the calls
All along the journey
we carry the question together
the questions we are looking for are wicked
they breathe around paradox
the answers are in flux
the answers are in action
they walk us towards our learning edge
they face inwards towards what we cannot see in ourselves
they shine a light on what stays in the dark
so that we can throw them in the cauldron
of our emerging power
we create
our maps of the world
maps of our own lives
maps of our roads to change
we carry the question together
how do I act in the world?
we carry the question together
we carry the question together
and build our cathedral of power
from the moving center of the wave
we tend to the question mark together
we become the stewards for the exploration
what are the stories I tell myself
about what is fake, and what is real?
we tend to the question mark together
we learn to care for the living process
we learn our dance of water
ici - ailleurs 